Please Tell Them This
PLEASE TELL THEM THIS
Upon my return from a yoga and art teacher training, a few weeks ago a woman asked me to support her bedridden father. Her father lived the life of a cowboy in Arizona. He is also a poet and environmentalist.
When I arrive at his bedside, the cowbow-poet is usually asleep so, we breathe together. I have seen him three times and each time we go on very vivid adventures; in some unknown realm we ride horses, lie in the grass and I even got a fly fishing lesson. The adventures are vivid indeed full of sensory impressions like I can sense and imagine the temperature of the air and water, the moisture of the ground, I can feel the breeze on my skin, I am moved to tears by this man’s love of life and I wonder… I wonder about the quality of his presence, I wonder about his ability to connect with nature, I wonder about his life as poetic experience , an experience of communion and intimacy . From his bed, moving in and out of consciousness this man is cracking my heart open, he is revealing to me the life I dream of …
My years of practicing Reiki mainly with horses has taught me the importance and power of letting go of agenda and finding center to allow spirit to do it’s work but I cannot help myself, I am wishing with all my being for this man to come back to a healthy life. I imagine that the sensory quality of the images/experiences indicate an incredibly nimble mind trained in advanced shamanic or yogic traditions… images so real, images that heal and have the potential to mend, anything, everything..
So when the cowbow-poet’s daughter asks me if I think he is ready to die I have to say: the clarity of his imaginal world makes me want to say no but the timing is really between him and God. She then asks me if I could write down some notes after each session, a little like a doctor would and that she would like to share them… Who would you like to share this with? I ask. So she names a couple of people and …the lawyer. Having already sensed some tension between family members and different care givers needless to say my little alarms bells were ringing… I am so so weary of interpreting, I observe, I track, I follow. I am a channel and student.
As I am asked what does the cowboy-poet want or need, I find myself walking a tight rope aware that any word I utter or any image I reveal has the potential of tilting the hopes one way or another.
I ponder how best to respond … and then it comes to me, art!
I journal my own process through writing and drawing so why not?
The aesthetic response as soul to soul dialogue that leaves space for spirit to move unencumbered by our need for answers letting love and compassion flow.
Here are words that came to me in my morning meditation unedited, authentic and vulnerable…to the glory of Creator:
PLEASE TELL THEM THIS
We are the birthmothers
Here
Let us accept graciously
The gift
Of birthing
The miracle of life
Let us let go of our agendas
Rising of fear and unforgiveness
And accept the gift of the golden eagle
Into our hearts
As honoring of
Transformation
As a butterfly
Incarnating before our eyes
The mystery
The greatest mystery of all
The weavings of a new robe
Made of golden strands of love
Timeless
Ubiquitous
All love surrounds us
To connect to each other in love
Hold the basket of this dear planet
Its beauty
The montains wild creeks at night
Cold sunsets
The same mountains creeks nights run through us
The same beauty runs through us
The beauty of the world offered
Through another’s loving eyes
As reflection of who we are
Just love
Just love me
Let go of trying just be
In beauty with me
Magic runs through
My greatest gift to me
Is you receiving me
Dancing with me
As lovers do
Into the light of life
This is eternity
one moment
In your eyes lost and found again
I see me
Washed renewed
Glorious happy
Beyond words
My breath between the trees
As the silence between the words
I glide upon you
As fingers lightly through your hair
Silky threads rippling like water
back to the pond
I swim in your fragrance
Between the trees
Between the words
Between you and me
I find us free
Andree